Hello fellow wankers,
 
      So sorry it has taken me so long to write you, but today is
the first day that I  have been sober enough to actually sit down
and write Since the week of the FUCK OFF.  Because Frankly all i
remember is driving to Corpus (well actually riding because PISS
BREAK drove, I was drinking) . So we get to Corpus and basically i
remember is drinking beer, alize, a shit load of jello shots (thanks
to PLUG MY HOLE) and what ever else i could get my hands on. (i wish
it was the cute blonde that was there that night but i think all
hopes went out the window when i started to walk around naked in 30
degree weather.  IT GETS BIGGER I SWEAR)  but anyway so TWAT had all
these guest over at his house all dress up for a Christmas party and
before gift exchange we were going to do a little hashing around the
block in the neighbort hood. well i though that the STREAKIN FREAK
should go out in style and live out his name since corpusmy mother
hash is the place where i was named.  So i did the whole hash with
only a shirt and shoes on.  well after a good trail laid by i have
no fucking clue still..... we went to the back of Channel 3 BOOBS
pad where Twat does what he does best and that is comences to FUCK
ME UP!  After many Down Downs outta the Beloved Bed Pan (many that
were way to full) i was feeling a little woozy OK oK alot woozy
ok..... I WAS DRUNK !   Oh i almost forget (right) before all this
started i was placed on a 10lb bag of ice, mind you it was like 2
degress as it was already outside...much shrinkage.  Make note that
i was placed on the ice at about 2 or 2:30 pm.  Well down down after
down down and gettin er done CORPUS STYLE  it comes to the time when
all my fellow and beloved hashers FUCK ME OFF!  I think everyone and
there brother was there some of these people i didnt even recognize
maybe this is partly due to wankers throwing beer all over me and on
top of my head which resulted in my contact burning like hell for
aliitle bit until a really sober and SMART hasher decided to douche
me with a gallon of water.... now remember i said its like 2
degress... thanks though i did eventually regain my eye sight. So
back to the fuck off all my fellow hashers fuck me off bettter than
i ever though.... i didnt even think they liked me!  Well now that
the hash is over time to go inside...just to let you know it like
12:30am yeah thats right these bastards left me on the ice for 10
hours or so... what friends!  So we go inside for gift exchange...oh
wait didnt bring anything... so ill just stand in CHANNEL 3 BOOBS
living room during the gift exchange naked as a jay bird and i mean
naked missing everything except my hat.(wonder what the non hashers
thought...ahhh screw those rednecks)  CREME has the pics ...if you
think your stomach is strong enough.  Well anyway i guess i lasted
long enough... not sure woke up the next morning like what the hell
happened... and yeah i had like frost bite on my ass thanks TWAT! 
So time to pack up and head up north because its time to do it all
over again.  On the way up i had PISS BREAK turn on the heater and i
comenced to press my ass cheeks against the vent still trying to
thaw my ass out.  So I get up good old San Antonio and the clock
rolls around the 3:30... time to hash.    Again a shitty trail laid
by GRION GROPER and sorry cant remember but you did a shitty job not
as shitty as MOUNT EVERY BREAST and BONA LISA but close.  Trail
ended in a new housing area that was still being built after
standing around for awhile hasher started circling wait for the RA
CREME FILLED to hurry up becuase it was getting rediculously cold. 
well cirlce started everyone having a great time new virgins were
getting broke in the right way... i mean getting drunk u perverts.  
Then its that time again.....FUCK NOT THE ICE!  Called in the circle
and was placed on the every so glorious ice block... i didnt know
this but i think san antonio recycles the same bag of ice over and
over again.  i thought i seen marking laid there by GAYLORD FOCKER
when he had came to town and stole our "mantle"...  keep dreaming
gaylord we know better.  but anyway on the ice...time to fuck me
off.but wait lets back track since its a tradition in Corpus to hang
the hashers shoes up in Doctor Rockets when you leave what the hell
was i going to wear  to the hash in san antonio.  I though about it
and well since you guys are awesomeand mean alot i though i would
sacrifice my shoes that ive had since i came in the army....i know.
i know i didnt have to but being the guy that i am.  i went to the
trash can and pulled them back out.  So back to the ice TEKILLYA
TITS you are awesome for being the first one to fuck me off...i bet
now your regretting it..Well all my fellow hasher stood up and
FUCKED ME... i mean fucked me off of course. Thank you for all the
kind and herat felt words we all know that beer is a truth serum and
i appreciate all the kind words  My ass was cold one again and
though i should seek medical attention but tuffed it out.  Just to
let eveyone know i would re-live those two night over again at
anytime i have no regrets thats for sure!
 
 
 
These two days that i just wrote about are amongst the many i have
experienced since becoming a hasher.  And boy the ones i can
remember are filled with nothing but great times and alot of fun.
And i bet the ones that i dont remember i had fun also. But of
course i would never had the chance to do this if it wasnt for my
brother SLAP-SQUEALS LIKE A PIG.  The people that i have encountered
since hashing have beeen the best group of people i think i could
ever met.  I will miss all of you.  You never know what you have had
until it is gone.  And i will miss all of you tremendously. 
Remember hashing is just fun and builds comraderie so lets keep it
ithat way. I will do a thousand down downs when i get over to
germany and show them how to get er done the right way!  ON ON
 
SLAP-  My brother from another mother.  Oh how the memories fly
through my head (Vehicle lot and brown socks is all i have to
say ..lol).  I have some thanks to give to you. If it wasnt for you
none of these memories, friends i have made, and fun times that i've
had would of ever happened.Thank you.  For being one of the best
friends i ever had. Thank you  Even during the hard times when
things werent going so well, not giving up and saying fuck it to a
good friendship.  Thank you  Staying back in san antonio to my very
last day no matter what the cost.  THANK YOU!  This shows me the
type of person that you are, not the person who i first though you
were. You have been there when i need you and still there when i
didnt. I would come back tomorrow and knuckledrag through cold and
rainy wetaher to corpus in a heart beat!  Good luck to you my
brother keep your head up high and until we meet again. LOVE YA
BRO!  ON-ON    K-9! 
 
CREME FILLED-  Look at the maroose mother fucker right here.  What
the hell can i say.  Well lets start with dude what the hell
happened to you hair?  GEEZ  well where to start with you.  I guess
it would be playing guitar and getting fucked up in you living room
every friday until we started to hash.huh?  i cant say enough about
my fellow PA brother.You have always been there for me from letting
me get drunk at your house and staying in you back bedroom to me
getting drunk and letting me live in your back bedroom.  AND
cantforget THREES COMPANY! Thanks for putting up with all my shit. 
I know these others think im the best thing since sliced bread but i
have my flaws.  You put up with all of them with out saying a word. 
All those drunken nights at ROXYS  and SHANIGANS and how could i
forget CHACHOS.  oh man.  You have the a great heart John i know at
the fuck off you said i had a good one... but it doesnt even compare
to yours.  You have been one of my best friends and i cant in no way
thank you or show you how much i appreciate all the things you have
done for me. I cant wait until the day when we can all meet up again
and just enjoy each other company like good friends do.  I will
never forget you!   ON- ON brother hasher LOVE YA! K-9!
 
TEKILLYA TITS & GUAM-  Thanks you for running the hash.  I know it
takes alot of your personal time and effort to maintian us drunken
bastards and bastardettes.  But we all appreciate it.  You guys are
just totally awesome.  I dont think i could of met a cooler couple
than you guys.  I will miss you and hope that you guys can make it
to world hash.  Oh and thank you guam for knighting CREME, SLAP and
me as san antonio hasheres becasue it was always hell for the three
of us to try to drink all your beer.
ON-ON
 
TWAT & CHANNEL 3 BOOBS-  I have one thing to say to both or
you....THANKS!  TWAT for fucking me up everytime i went and hashed
in corpus and Channel for letting me have a place to stay after he
fucked me up.  I hope one day we can get together again hash.  Keep
it real down there in corpus and dont let it get weak.  keep
tradition alive!
 
PUERTO RICAN JEW & PLUG MY HOLE-  HOLY SHIT where do i start with
you two.  oh i know apple pucker at fuck off, no. JEW getting naked
underneath his hula..no more jello shots than a party of a thousand
can eat. no  knuckle dragging together no.  packing JEWS ear full of
flour during his naming. no LETS start with PISSING IN YOUR
NEIGHBORS CAR i hink thats a good place.  Boy you guys rule.  true
hashers always going outta your way and either dressing up in some
gay ass chemo suit or letting hasher destroy you house.  I will miss
you guys also.  You cant find to many people like you guys now a
days.  And i meant that in a good way. Thank you for all the
memories ON-ON
 
EZ CUMS-  Well i wouldnt know but i could ask someone that might. 
Well sisiter what can i say.  It seems everytime we "get together" i
seem to piss you off.  I know you know that i didnt do any of it on
purpose and were cool.  Thank for being on of the coolest chicks ive
ever met.  I have had alot of good times with you at the hash and
will remember our conversations forever.  So now that everyone
thinks that we got it on i will tell them the truth.  ME and EZ
never got it on once......we actually did the deed like 47 times
over a span of 7 hours at inter hash ....wait that wasnt her. 
sorry  Thanks for everything!  ON-ON
 
PISS BREAK, PEE BISKET, CROTCH ROT, OBE ONE KABOOBIE, JAIL HOUSE
COCK, BOOBIE BUNCH-  All my fellow k9 bro and sisters.  I have just
as many memories off work with you guys than i have at the hash. 
You are all my friends and thanks for all the kind words at the
fuckoff.  You bitches drank outta my shoe ...sweet! I  will miss you
guys alot.  Please dont be strangers you have my email so use it.
ASSES!
 
WOW so many people i have come to like and love.  Rotten Crotch i
mean CHERRY, LYBIA OF THE RING,ANYTHING FOR A BUCK, EZ GOES, JUNGLE
PUSSY, INVISA BITCH,7 YEAR BITCH, BAT (IMA BITCH ASS)
GUANOGIRL,TITTER TWATTER, SISTER FOCKER, GAYLORD FOCKER, CHEMO, BLUE
BALLS...DAMN i know i missing people hold on....FUCK NUT, BIG YAK
ATTACK, MOUNT EVERY BREAST, BONA LISA, GRION GROPPER, PUKS OF
HAZZARD, PENICILLIAN VILLIAN, FUCK YOU KNAVE,  YAMAHO, KIMCHI CAB
DELIGHT, NO SUCKY JUST FUCKY,  man i know i missing people
 
Well if i missed you please dont feel like i did not like you i just
cant remember ... its probably because i was way to drunk to
remember your name...hey it happens.  Well thank you all too.  I did
not just show up to the hash to see the people i regularly hung out
with. they suck anywaylol  it was for you guys to.  Ive met nothing
but great people at the hash and have enjoyed you laughing at my
small penis and getting drunk with yas.  You guys made the hash
really fun for me and i thank you.  Keep the hash alive bring
friends and show them the good time that can be had by all.  Again i
will miss everryone but will cherish the memories that i have ON-ON
to all my fellow hasher may we meet again someday!!!!
 
 
Thank you all for all you have given me
STREAKIN FREAK
TODD JOHNSON
 
email:  streakin_freak2003@yahoo.com